Wednesday, April 17, 2013

YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS



It has never been so easy to criticize, complain, and point fingers, as it is today. The internet guarantees open leeway for trolls and other notorious critics. But of course that behavior as a whole is nothing new. People were always like that. The only thing is that before they didn’t have the megaphone, which is the Internet today, to announce their thoughts.

Here’s a proposition, a principle that you will probably find much easier to live by: the “you’re responsible for this” principle. It works like this:

Every time you want to complain about a situation or about someone, you will be responsible to fix it. If you don’t want to be responsible in doing anything to fix it, then shut your mouth.


For example: you criticize the lack of cleanliness in your work place. So now you’re responsible for fixing the problem. Pick up the vacuum, or go speak to the person in charge of the cleaning team, or go and ask for more trashcans in your section, or go clean your own plate in the kitchen after lunch. Perfect, now you’re responsible. If you don’t want to be responsible, then please don’t criticize how they’re cleaned. Spare someone’s ears.

You thought the presentation of the marketing manager was tedious. An hour long of blah, blah, blah, which didn’t amount to anything. So now you’re in charge of improving the quality of the presentations of the company. You’ll give your feedback (who knows maybe even the two colleagues you talk to will too,) give suggestions for improvement to the presenters, you’ll contribute ideas, you’ll contact the HR department about communication training for the presenters, or perhaps even give those “bores” a book on the subject. Anything contrary, zip your pie hole and focus on your own life.

Perhaps you consider this principle a bit radical. Instead of complaining, if everyone applied this principle at work, at home, in school, in the community, in the city and in their own life, imagine how better everything would be.

So remember, when your tongue itches and you feel tempted to criticize someone or something, first ask yourself if you are prepared to be responsible to improve the situation. If not, choose silence.

P.S. Try out saying this to someone who lives complaining and criticizing in your ear. Very, very soon, they will stop…

P.S.S. See that Jesus applied this principle too: When the day was now far spent, His disciples came to Him and said, “This is a deserted place, and already the hour is late. Send them away, that they may go into the surrounding country and villages and buy themselves bread; for they have nothing to eat.” But He answered and said to them, “You give them something to eat.” – Mark 6:35-37

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By Bishop Renato Cardoso

30 comments:

  1. This is always the first instinct to point the finger and complaining, it becomes so easy after a while, every time I'm about to do that again i'll remember this article.

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  2. When I read this message I saw complaining on a whole different level…. I certainly will start putting this into practice. I am actually quite ashamed as I have found myself on this side of the coin. With this the world would be a much better place with this tool in hand. Thank you for sharing. Rania

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  3. LOVE this post, so very true. I admit that it took me a while to realize that instead of complaining about things I should do something about it or shut up. So this definitely applies to me, I take it for myself and I'm working on it.

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  4. This is very strong. If you wont do anything about the situation instead of going online to vent, fix it.

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  5. If it has to do with someone speak to the person or if yourself deal with it right away.

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  6. As i read this there is a lot of things that came to my mind we can criticize as long as it is Godly and loving and true it must also be caring from the heart that wishes good for the other person it must not be cold, bitter or insulting,it must be with gentleness. as 1st 5 vs 11 Thessalonian says our speech should be edifying, we must also encourage one another build up each other ' Criticism based on gossip is not helpful and may harmful to the person,and there are a lot of scriptures that we can learn from in order to fix a situation instead of going public like on the internet or any social network we can take charge and fix a problem and as proverbs 18 vs 21 says "death and life is in the power of out tongue, instead we can seek Gods intervention before we do such things to find fault, for he has given us a whole lot of scripture to guide us through as Psalm 34vs13 says "Keep our tongue, from evil and our lips from speaking deceit . James 3vs 10 also reminds us that "From the same mouth comes blessing and cursing, and these things ought not to be so we also read in Matthew that its not what goes into a persons mouth that defiles them is what comes out ,so the next time we think to criticize we must think of the solution to fix it and we also read in Psalm that the tongue plots destruction like a sharp razor you workers of deceit so as i conclude am not saying am a perfect person i do sometimes criticize but i learn that it must be in a kind and positive manner and not to hurt any one feeling for God will not be happy and as Christians we must be ready to take on the whole Armour of God to do his will

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  7. this is very, very strong i have nothing to add to it the message says it all.i will definitely apply this to my every day.

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  8. we are not supposed to be quick to judge or point fingers at other but we ourselves supposed to find the solution.(miss maxine chambers- hagley park)

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  9. this passage is so true , we must not be judgmental but to do it ourselves and find a solution.

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  10. Tanyika said...

    So remember, when your tongue itches and you feel tempted to criticize someone or something, first ask yourself if you are prepared to be responsible to improve the situation. If not, choose silence.
    Very important...very strong!

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  11. We as servant must follow Our Lord Jesus Christ to always bring solution to the work of God. When we point or complaint about the work of God,we are worse than the one that do the work of God any how. I must always remember that i'm doing God's work and not man.

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  12. the house thats is devide will never stand so our body is the temple of god if we gossip and do all those foolishness then our temple will fall. we must be united a one and in agreement as servant of god for the woke of god to continue to grow. mr and ms elvis swaby hagley park

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  13. in the work of God we don't criticize another servant but we should work together to fullfil what is to be done.

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  14. as servants we should work together we shouldn't be criticize or point fingers if their something to be done you do and stop to talk about another..hycolette

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  15. this is so true i never looked at it this way i will start to practice this from now on.

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  16. It is very hard not to complain about an untidy room, but when you are going to talk and blab and blab some more about it, that is not going to clean the room, get to work clean it yourself.
    "So remember, when your tongue itches and you feel tempted to criticize someone or something, first ask yourself if you are prepared to be responsible to improve the situation. If not, choose silence".

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  17. I agree with the you are resposible because we will stop criticize, when we see that we have to do the dirty work of others, there would be a lot to do on my part and no time to do our own chores so this would put us in a situation not to even say a word about any matter of criticism. I will always remember this article whenever i make the attempt to criticize. Rachael Stewart Hagley Park

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  18. I totally agree with this message, if I find the fault instead of complaining and pointing finger the enery wasted could be used to amend it.

    Margaret Fraser-Phillips

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  19. The word of God talk about the eye in Matthew 6 vs 22-23 if our eye is bad then the whole body is in darkness, so the eye see first before it can criticize. so as we see in our day to day life no one want to take responsibility for nothing but when other take up the post many is there to bash and criticize.
    Sheryle Wilson

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  20. many will no not take responsibility for their action, but is always ready to criticize another action and down fall
    Michelle McCrae & Damion McCrae

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  21. This is strong and so true, you know what many times we make this mistakewithout even realizing it so basically it is saying instead of critizing do something about it. Be a person tha bring solution not problems and complaints.

    Hagley Park branch

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  22. I think that instead of criticizing, be the solution because sometimes a person may not be thinking about that way out at the moment then you come along and instead criiicizing you help solve the problem.


    Avis Bowes
    Hagley Park branch

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  23. Stop complaining ,do something positive.

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  24. This teach us not criticize others, instead of criticizing it's best we show the right thing to do by helping each other.
    Sylvia Brown

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  25. As a servant of God it's not for us to point fingers on any one,as servant we must pray for God to get strenght for that person to strong in the work of God as Timothy ch5:8. Anthony Dockery(hp)

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  26. When you point your finger on someone four more fingers point right back at you. We must not be quick to point fingers on someone, look at yourself first. We must not be quick to critize one another. Before I critize a person I help them. My mother always say if you don't have anything good to say shut your mouth or bite your lips. Because the tongue is a deadly weapon, if you don't control your mouth it is going to control you. That is just the reality.
    Nicole Wellington

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  27. We say we want to do the work of god right so y aer we critize oneanother. Before you critize someone take a look hat yaur self firt before you critize a person.Monique Fordes

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  28. This is an eye opener for me to check myself an analyze because this message is strong an at times we do things an dnt realize what we are doing and this is a way the holy spirit is speaking. God bless

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  29. It is easy to see the faults of others and bec0me judgmental but when the ball is placed in your court you can not do better or change the situation ,while if we gave a helping hand or an encouraging word this might help to change the situation.Why behold the moth in some one eyes while a plank is in yours

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  30. its very easy to point finger but what many are for getting always is that when ever u point one finger there is four more pointing right back at you and worse laughing at you of your own shame and disgrace

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